45 year old man dating a 27 year old woman
You are in your late twenties, a time in life when you are just beginning to become sure of who you are and what you want. You are creating your life while he is already in the prime of his. If you were 40 and he was 55, I would not be as concerned about the age difference as both of you would have had ample time to experience life and mold your identity. By dating someone so much older, you are missing out on being with someone who is in the same phase of life that you are; someone with whom you can share the joys and pitfalls of discovery. Plus, this is a new relationship and you need to take into account that some of the sparks you feel come from the novelty of it.
You mentioned that you are not trying to live out some father figure fantasy. Okay, but consider this: I speak from experience. In my twenties, I dated a man who was eleven years my senior and it was great until I realized I was living vicariously through him.
I wanted to be where he was in his life - accomplished, more confident, and all the other things that come with additional years on the planet. What I realized is that I was trying to skip over my own twenty-something experience by coat-tailing his life. Sure, we had the same kind of connection you speak about and I really did feel like we were kindred sprits in a lot of ways; however, the unavoidable truth was that we were at very different points of our lives.
Dating an older man can be an ego boost since being wanted by someone older makes you feel more mature. I share this with you because I encourage you to ask yourself if some of his appeal lies in the simple fact that he is older.
Furthermore, other than the very obvious reasons, why is a year-old dating a year-old? Has he ever been married or in a serious committed relationship? Think about your needs and growth. Do you want to spread your wings and live the carefree singles life for a while, or are you looking to settle down into the lifestyle that he has spent the past two decades creating? Since I realize my advice is very one-sided, and I really don't know anything about you or your love interest, I want to offer you a different perspective.
I forwarded your question to Dr. Here is what she had to say: Age is just a number, but love, connection, values, compatibility and chemistry are real.
On Dating An Older Man
And by the way, they are real hard to find in one person, so thank your lucky stars that you have found your soul mate. Celebrate your union and enjoy each moment you spend together. A word of caution though, if you think and anticipate failure, you will surely achieve it! Check out the All Forums page. We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out. View your post below. We just need to check something in your message and will publish it as soon as we can.
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What can you expect from the first two weeks of uni? Students reveal all here Start new discussion Reply. What do you think of this age gap? I agreed to meet up with him but now Im having doubts because of the age difference. What do you think?? Follow 2 Shortstack Follow 2 followers 0 badges Send a private message to Shortstack. Follow 3 You have to think why does he want to get involved with a immature 18 year old compared to himself No offence intended. Follow 4 Original post by alawhisp "Dating"?
Follow 5 Just be careful, it does sound a bit suspicious him going after an year old girl I think he's only after sex, but if you like him and he wants a relationship with you, then it's totally your decision. But for me the age gap is a little too wide 5 max for me. Follow 6 One of my bezzies is 21 and in a great relationship with a 33 year old guy.
They've been together a year and he is awesome to her, never cheated or messed her around. Go for it, he might just turn out to be a keeper! Follow 7 Follow 8 I am totally amazed at the ridiculous shallowness of people on tsr As pointed out by previous poster, the age gap does not make a difference. Both of you are of legal age. If you are not comfortable with the gap, then perhaps you should let him know and take it from there. Otherwise, judge him on his personal character as opposed to what day he was born.
Follow 9 Original post by SugarPuffs Just be careful, it does sound a bit suspicious him going after an year old girl I think he's only after sex, but if you like him and he wants a relationship with you, then it's totally your decision. If any of my male friends went out with an 18 year old, they would get mocked relentlessly. I guess I would assume that there must be something wrong with him emotionally if he has to go out with someone so much younger and less mature. It doesn't mean he's necessarily a creep or a predator, and I'm sure there are plenty of examples where it has worked out fine, but I would be wary.
Original post by Anonymous What do you think of this age gap? Follow 12 Original post by ManAbout Right and 18 year old guys never do that.. All 18 year old guys want is a stable, loving relationship..
What You Must Know Before Dating an Older Man | PairedLife
Sorry, but you're just making assumptions and over-generalisations by judging the age gap without actually knowing anything about the guy. Bit prejudice of you, I think. A big age gap doesn't automatically mean a guy is just using a girl for sex. Every guy is different, and every guy should be judged on who he is and whether him and the girl have chemistry with each other. You shouldn't just automatically think 'Oh he's 27, she's 18, that means he's using her'. So I think you want to go and rethink your beliefs and stereotype attitude towards men. Original post by alawhisp I never said otherwise.
No idea why you'd think that I was implying that 18 year old boys are wonderful options when it comes to dating. Did I hit a nerve? I don't stereotype men. It was an off the cuff comment. I don't know the guy, obviously I don't know what his intentions are. He could be an absolute angel who wants to treat her like gold.
The average 18 year old is fresh from high school, sometimes barely into university, usually without much experience of responsibilities or relationships. The average 27 year old has completed their education, been in employment for a few years, has been in numerous relationships, and has managed adult responsibilities. I personally can't really understand why an average 27 year old would want to date an average 18 year old.
Most people I know who are on the cusp of 30 are looking for someone special to settle with, rather than looking for someone who fancies the boys from One Direction. Of course, this man could be a perennial man-child, I don't know. In that case, he won't want anything serious, and as long as she shares those expectations, they'll get on just fine. Follow 14 Follow 15 It doesn't make a man less mature or a 'man child' just because he prefers younger girls. Men are biologically attracted to younger girls, girls are biologically attracted to older guys.
That's the way life works. But you get a lot of people who make up all these silly theories like 'men who date younger girls haven't grown up' or 'men who like younger girls are emotionally stunted', blah blah blah. Being attracted to younger girls doesn't mean you're immature Nothing wrong with that. Also, 18 and 27 isn't a massive age gap really. If he was in his 40s or 50s, then yeah.
But 18 and 27 is fine. Also, a lot of women who are 25 to 35 have more emotional baggage because they've been hurt by men, had bad relationships, etc and are jaded about men. Or they realise the biological click is ticking and want to meet a man they can have kids with, settle down with and marry, etc. I find younger girls have less baggage and are more fun and optimistic to be around.
I'd rather date a hot, young, 18 year old girl than some 25to 35 year old woman who is reaching the end of her prime. Age doesn't matter, and anyone who has a problem with older guys dating younger guys well it's their problem. Follow 16 Original post by alawhisp Age doesn't matter?
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So you must think it's fine and daDate who you want, as long as it's legal and you both like each other. I mean, she's young and fun and optimistic. Original post by alawhisp Your post is dripping with hostility towards older women.
- What You Must Know Before Dating an Older Man?
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Original post by alawhisp Basically, you want an "untainted" girl. Original post by alawhisp You want someone with no experience,. Original post by alawhisp You don't want an independent, mature, intelligent and challenging woman.